A to Z Challenge – V (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content. So, if you’re really young or don’t enjoy dirty things, just don’t read it. No harm, no foul. Otherwise…enjoy. :)

image V is for the Virginal Sub-genre

In many romance novels, especially historical ones, the heroine is a virgin or very close to it.

I don’t mind if a heroine is a pure as snow or a lady that has been around the block a few times.  Either way, I do like it when my heroine is strong and confident in her sexuality – knowing what she wants and not being ashamed of it.  :)

V is also for Vampires

Did you think I’d forgotten the paranormal sub-genre when I didn’t bring it up under the letter “p?”  Silly you, it’s because I wanted to talk about them all separately. ;)

Vampires are my favorite paranormal romantic heroes.  Do you need to ask why?  Isn’t obvious that a vampire hero oozes sex appeal? He shamelessly seduces a young virgin into the shadows, his teeth growing as his hunger mounts… That moment when he brushes the heroine’s hair aside, before plunging his teeth deep into her neck – groaning as he tastes her.

oh dear, and who thought vampires were supposed to be scary? ;)

A to Z Challenge – U (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content. So, if you’re really young or don’t enjoy dirty things, just don’t read it. No harm, no foul. Otherwise…enjoy. :)

image

U is for uncovered

Uncovered as in getting naked!  I have your attention now, don’t I?

Well, in lovely romance novels, when the hero is uncovered it is a moment deserving of silence -
- Abs? Chiseled!
- Pecs? Bulging, possibly glistening.
- Junk? Also bulging and possibly glistening.  hehehe ;)
…..Reader?  Fanning herself.

When the heroine gets naked?  Well, sorry boys, as most of these books are written for women, heroines vary in shapes and sizes (big change from movies and TV).  But there is one constant (for which we are glad), whatever their shape, the hero will always find them lovely. :)

…And then, most likely growl and pounce on her (thus beginning life changing sex).  <Sigh> The last thing I growled at was excel (damn, evil spreadsheet). :p

A to Z Challenge – T (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content. So, if you’re really young or don’t enjoy dirty things, just don’t read it. No harm, no foul. Otherwise…enjoy. :)

imageT is for Tension (as in sexual)

You’ve been there before, haven’t you?  The flirting that seems to heat up a room, stolen glances or a full perusal of someone (hey, you like what you see), touching a hand and feeling warm skin glide under your fingers, wondering if it will get to that next level. Or sometimes even mouthing off to someone and then, their eyes flash, they’re up in your face, and you’re torn between the urge to kiss them or slap them. :) (Okay, okay – so this has never happened to me, but I did tell you that I love the enemy romance genre, remember?)

Ah yes, sexual tension – where would romance novels…or the lead up to real life romances be without you?

T can also be for threesome (in some of those group love romance/erotica)

Call me old fashion, boring, or a prude, but I am not into all of these group sex novels.  I feel like it mimics a fight scene in a movie – two people in the center, with the rest of the group circling around and waiting for their chance to join in.  <Bleh!>  Not to mention, there are too many names/random body parts to keep track of. :p

Sorry boys, but for this girl – romances and sex are best one on one.  Maybe I’m no good at sharing, but if I want something bad enough, why would I want to share?

A to Z Challenge – S (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content. So, if you’re really young or don’t enjoy dirty things, just don’t read it. No harm, no foul. Otherwise…enjoy. :)

imageS is for the Spy

Never in my life have I heard of so many spies making use of their sexual prowess to suss out the enemy (maybe bugging is too complicated?) or allowing their lust for a sweet, pretty heroine to completely blow their op (since when did boobs become a liability to covert ops?).

But hey, what do I know?  Maybe romance novels are the art dictated by life.  I’ll have to ask a super sexy secret agent what his methods are, whenever I see one. :p

S is also for seduction ;)

Hey now…we can’t have romance novels without some serious seduction going on.  Well, technically we can – but where’s the fun in that?

Seduction is that gentle breeze that teases your skin, just before the first flash of lightning and the quake of thunder…   Come now, why wouldn’t we want that in our romance novels? :)

A to Z Challenge – R (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content. So, if you’re really young or don’t enjoy dirty things, just don’t read it. No harm, no foul. Otherwise…enjoy. :)

imageR is for Rogues, Rakes, and Ruin!

Are you a bad boy hero in days of yore?  Are you up to no good?  <Gasp!>  Rogue!!  Rake!!

Rogue!  Are you planning revenge on someone/some family that wronged you?  Perhaps the best way to get to your sworn enemy is to cozy up to his daughter/sister/cousin…and compromise her!  Strangely enough, as you get closer to causing her ruin, you start to notice how sweet and innocent she is…

Are you a wicked rake simply because, well, it’s fun?  Well, well, well.  You should beware, good sir.  I’ve no doubt that this coming season, you will meet a lady that will turn your world upside-down (and you’ll enjoy every minute of it).

Has a sinister lord tasked you with ruining a young woman’s reputation in order to save your family’s estate/free someone from prison/gain their vote in parliament?  Deep down you know it’s wrong, and yet – it’s for the greater good, right? (Keep telling yourself that, you rakish rouge!)  Not that it would be a great sacrifice on your part, as the lady holds a strange allure that breaks down your defenses.  Just remember that the lady will find out about your motivations, and usually at the most inopportune time.

Regardless of your motivations, my scandalous hero, you will certainly cause a lot of trouble (but damn, you are wickedly charming while doing your misdeeds). ;) I have a feeling that you’ll get caught in your own trap and eventually prove yourself to be a good man…otherwise you wouldn’t be a true romantic hero. :)

A to Z Challenge – Q (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content – though not really in this post. So, if you’re really young or don’t enjoy dirty things, just don’t read it. No harm, no foul. Otherwise…enjoy. :)

imageQ is for the Quadrille

If you’ve read a couple of historical romance novels, chances are (in at least one of them), the heroine attended a dance.  Apparently, that’s all they did back in the day – attend dances and with any luck, the heroine would get backed into a dark corner or empty balcony by a handsome duke. ;)

Anyway, at these dances, people were expected to, well dance – and they were complex dances with crazy steps and often involved changing partners.  Thankfully, dancing has become much less complicated – swaying your hips and grinding on someone seems much less complicated than the waltz or, my q word for the day, the quadrille.

What is the quadrille, you ask?  Essentially, it’s a plot devise used by historical romance authors to allow:
-the hero and heroine to touch briefly while dancing (gasp! so scandalous back in the day!)
-the heroine’s heart to beat frantically due to her close proximity to the hero (ohh, he’s so much taller and muscular than we thought!  Be still, my beating heart!)
-our two main characters to lock eyes from across the room, possibly while dancing with other people (grrr, jealousy!)
-our hero to enjoy the feeling of his hand on the heroine’s waist or to ogle her boobs up close (naughty, hero!) ;)

A to Z Challenge – P (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content - though not really in this post.

image

P is for Pirates!

Arrr!  Heehee, sorry. :)

There are many historical romances that revolve around swashbuckling heroes, with long, flowing hair and sexy, tanned skin.  The pirate sub-genre has been around FOREVER and I’d bet that this trend is not likely to stop anytime soon, especially with Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom in dirty pirate garb burned permanently in our brains.  And no, that’s not a complaint. ;)

And now for couple of fairly tame and silly pirate jokes to honor of these hot, dangerous heroes:

- How much did it cost for a pirate to pierce his ears?  – A buck-an-ear!

- Why are pirates mean? Or, why are romance novel pirates so sexy? — Because they arrrrrr.  :)

A to Z Challenge – O (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content – especially in this post. So, if you’re really young or don’t enjoy dirty things, just don’t read it. No harm, no foul. Otherwise…enjoy. :)

imageO is for the Big O

Since my theme this month is essentially an ongoing, mostly raunchy homage to romance/erotica, it should come as no surprise that my o word of the day is orgasm.

Oh come on…you knew we were building up to this, didn’t you? ;)   

We all know that there’s a fair amount of sex (some more raunchy than others) in my favorite genre.  But in case you didn’t know –  in romance novels, sex is very rarely sub-par or even good enough.  Romance novel sex is mind-blowing and addictive for the hero and heroine.  It causes our characters to hurtle to the edge of oblivion as they experience life changing, wake-up-the-neighborhood-level orgasms.

<whew> Makes you wish that romance land accepted visas from us real life people, doesn’t it? ;)

A to Z Challenge – N (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content – especially in this post. So, if you’re really young or don’t enjoy dirty things, just don’t read it. No harm, no foul. Otherwise…enjoy. :)

imageN is for the Nub

Well, we’ve already paid homage to junk in romance novels and their massive importance. ;)  Now, it’s time to move on to the nub and all the amusing names for it in romance/erotica (and in general) – it’s the bundle of sensitive nerves, the clit, the bean, nature’s Rubik’s cube (I love “Family Guy”), the love button, the cherry gum drop, the doorbell (must ring for service), and proof that being a woman is awesome (take that you standing pee-ers!).  Heehee.  Hey, I had to make up for the lack of raunch in my last two posts. ;)

One of the many lovely things about the world of romance/erotica is that 99.9% of heroes (I read one book that brings this stat down from 100%) are well versed in the female anatomy – sometimes more so than the heroine.  And for that, we are glad.

Cheers to the nub and the many knowledgable heroes (or those willing to learn)! :)

A to Z Challenge – M (AC)

A to Z Challenge

For the challenge, I’m focusing on the A to Z of reading and writing romance novels. This series of posts will contain Adult Content…though not in this post. :)

imageM is for Marriage

First comes love then comes marriage

Following that logic, since all romance novels have love in them then they should also have marriage.  This used to be the case in the old timey romance novels – except historicals, when the hero/heroine would sometimes enter into a loveless marriage and then fall in love with each other after.

Now, many romance novels written today end in marriage while some just end with the knowledge that the hero and heroine are meant to be together and are happy together.  I don’t mind either way, as long as they end up together at the end of the book (or the end of the trilogy, if the author wants to jerk your chain for a bit).  ;)